How To Grow, Evolve and Reinvent Yourself

I hope that everyone is enjoying their summer thus far, and we are finally getting back to some type of normalcy with our lives. I can say that I am happy to be out of the house and spending some quality time with family and friends again. If the pandemic has thought you one thing is that you must not take life for granted. Everyone will look back on this as a life-changing experience or not. However, experiences are what shapes our very character, our foundation for the future. Without them, we’d become empty shells without any substance.


This past year I finalized my divorced, sold my house, relocated to another area, started a new job, and continued to raise a teenage son. Talk about what an experience, and how I wish I could change particular things I did during that time. Yes, the things that suffered were my self-care routines, boundary setting, and settling for less than, which became a part of my daily life at that time. Before I knew it unwanted things that would not normally be a part of my life were, until I made a change. I soon begin to realized after regrets that I could not go back and change the beginning, but I could rewrite my ending as often as I would like. The goal is to keep growing from your experiences, evolving, and reinventing yourself. Reinventing yourself is not a betrayal of your essence, but essence of courage and strength.

Remember that family and friends are expecting you to stay the same. Yet, you have to trust that you are making the best decision for loving who you are. Toss out the old and in with the new. Try these three helpful tips that do not have to be difficult. Whatever your experience or motivation will be big or small take one day at a time.

How To Reinvent Yourself at any age

Self Care – As you begin to reinvent yourself your old self-care routines may change, so you may find that you want to do something new. Self-care does not always mean spas and bubble baths, however, you can just enjoy reading a book, yoga, or gardening in your yard. Find a hobby that you enjoy and turn it into your new self-care routine.

Manage Your Finances – If you are shifting or thinking about changing a career it is always best to take a look at your finances. If you are going through a divorce or moving to a new home, there is no better time to re-evaluate your finances. You may have to pay out extra expenses and you would like to be prepared than not prepared.

Create A Vision – Your vision can be created through any path. Think about things that you pride yourself in and follow that path. Yet, don’t think that this will be your final destination and you may find that you will change your vision again as we continue to grow, learn and experience different things throughout life.

Failure is normal when trying something new recognize it, learn from it, and move on. Failure in the end is the best way to learn how to evolve and reinvent yourself. It will take time, patience, and plenty of effort to make the change you want to see happen, but it will be all worth it in the end.

Rewrite your ending as often as you like Grow, Evolve, and Reinvent” – Cam

How To Stop Multi-tasking To Find Balance

Multi-tasking seems like a great way to get a lot of things done. For myself, I know that I try to juggle many different tasks in a day, and sometimes I don’t seem like I’ve accomplished anything by the end of the day. However, are our brains equipped to handle multiple tasks at a time? Multi-tasking seems like a great way to get a lot of things done. Yet, some research has suggested that multi-tasking can reduce our productivity by 40%. Did you know with all of the multi-tasking that we do it is likely to take a toll on our mental health? I know I continue to beat the self-care drum as we need reminders to make ourselves a priority.

My environment continues to be disruptive, with the phone ringing, message alerts, likes and comments, and co-workers emailing about things that are wrong at the job. In my opinion, this is designed in my life to get me to do more work and spend less time to be mentally present at home. All these distractions result in multi-tasking switching from one event to another, or one crisis to another. How can we begin to find the balance to stop multi-tasking where you are not completely exhausted by the end of the day.

Many days I wonder why I was so tired, soon I realize that multi-tasking also known as switch tasking was depleting all of my energy resources. You know that this is not a good way to get things done, yet the demands for our attention exist and our productivity reduces. What can we do to be more productive in our lives and find balance by minimizing multi-tasking? Below I wanted to share some tips that I started to incorporate into my life, I’m still a work in progress. However, I have found that I am not trying to juggle as many tasks as I have before by making these changes.

Ways to find balance, increase productivity without multi-tasking

Plan Your Day – When you don’t have a plan, this is when your day will plan you. It is difficult to stay focus on what needs to be done first when you don’t have a plan. When you have a plan your brain knows exactly what is want to accomplish and subconsciously prepares you to focus on the task at hand. You are less likely to be distracted and will minimize the need to multi-task.

Focus On One Task At A Time – It is difficult to focus on one task at a time when you are use to juggling multiple things. The benefit of focusing on one task at a time is making fewer mistakes at home and work. You will get more done and feel less tired at the end of the day. Make a list of things that you would like to get done, begin at the top and don’t start another task until the first one is completed.

Learn To Say No – Saying No does not mean that you are being rude. However, it does mean that you are not committing to things that you can not do, or you are simply delaying saying yes. Often times I have found that I may have said Yes to someone without really thinking about it. Later to discover that I have used an absorbent amount of energy trying to figure out how to get out of the commitment. By delaying your response allows you the opportunity to think about it, rather than having you worry if you will have the time to commit to another task.

Getting Enough Rest– Throughout my blog, I talk often about getting enough rest. When you are tired, your brain has less strength to resist things that can take away your attention. You will find your mind wandering, less focused and this is a sign for you to give your brain a rest. When you rest well your brain is fully recharged and ready to focus for the day.

Every once in a while we are required to multi-task, just as I was writing my 16-year-old son walked in and begin to talk about what he needs for the day, and my phone has sent me some alerts. So here I am finishing up this last bit of my blog post. Sometimes, it’s impossible to resist a little multi-tasking.

Self-Care After The Pandemic

We have been dealing with COVID-19 for over a year, and the end is now in sight. Have you thought about how you will continue your self-care routines once you return to your normal life? A year of COVID-19 limbo turned self-care into a mainstream pursuit. Everyone had to stop and come up with a daily plan on how they would go from going to the gym to working out at home, working in the office to working from home, and kids attending school to online learning. Whoa what a past year this has been, now we are back to reversing our plans from home to office, from indoors to outdoors to our kids transitioning back to in-person learning for the fall. Many people have become accustomed to the lives that they built around COVID. I like to say, COVID man caves or COVID she sheds. Are you ready to return to normal?

As we return to a new normal we can not overlook some of the damage that the pandemic has caused to our physical and mental health. National surveys show that many adults, teens, and children experienced psychological distress from the pandemic. According to the Mental Health of America, 1.5 million reported signs of anxiety and/or depression” as two of the leading signs of burden due to COVID. The impact of the pandemic has shown how a disruption in our lives can affect so many things. As we slowly return to normalcy self-care for the sake of our mental health is essential. For people who were able to make positive changes during the pandemic hold on to that positive change! Let’s take a look at how we can ease back into everyday life while keeping our self-care a priority without sending our bodies into shock. Gradual steps are needed for this transition.

Brainstorm on how you can incorporate things that you love back into your life. Resetting your self-care routine once you return to work, school, and everyday life is important. Yet, for some people practicing self-care will look different. Self-care is about giving ourselves what we need to be our best selves and setting up healthy goals and boundaries. Choose the way you want to treat yourself and spend time with yourself this will help you prioritize your well-being. Permit yourself to make you a priority.

After seven days evaluate – After seven days evaluate what worked for you and what didn’t. Use this as a positive reflection of feelings and the benefits of your accomplishments for the week.

Make adjustments as you go – It is okay to make adjustments as you go, if you see that this will work better then make the change. There is no need to wait just do it.

Sleep when you are tired – This is a hard one for me, I like to keep going until everything is finished. However, getting more sleep makes you better equipped to deal with things going on in your ever-changing life. Sometimes, that’s all it takes is sleep.

Be kind to yourself – Getting into a routine after a year is difficult, and finding out what will work for you will take some time. Being kind to yourself is paramount to any good self-care routine. Although our daily stressors will not completely disappear, finding a way to manage them with a continuous self-care routine is essential. Let’s continue to make our self-care a priority to cope with life’s ongoing changes.


“Be Kind, Be Patient, Be Accepting, Be All Those Things To Yourself ” Cam

Self-Love To Stop You From Settling For Less

We are slowly coming out of this pandemic, I am hopeful that the discovery of self-love continues to be a priority for many people. When we continue to love ourselves we will not settle for less in our work, personal relationships, and at home. I have learned throughout my journey that many times I have settled for less because it was comfortable. I would say settling has served its purpose in times when you need it, because you may not have the energy for anything new. Why do so many people settle? I have settled because I forgot some truths about my life and I stopped loving who I was as a person. When your truth does not guide you all hell breaks loose. When you find yourself sacrificing your self-love for comfort you will be in the same place mentally, physically, and emotionally.

For many people, self-love and settling will not come in the same sentence. These are just two things that we don’t think about at the same time. However, many psychologists will attest to self-love and settling are the key components to our mental health and well-being. Why is self-love so important? Self-love is important as it helps motivate you to make healthy choices in life. When you hold yourself to a higher standard you are less likely to settle for things that don’t nurture your well-being or serve you. One of the many benefits of self-love is having a positive mindset. A positive mindset is essential for success in life. This does not mean that you will feel happy every day, that’s unrealistic but it does mean that you can take some steps towards healthy habits without self-sabotaging yourself. Maybe now is the time to embrace self-love so you can stop settling for less in your life.

HOW TO PRACTICE SELF LOVE TO STOP SETTLING FOR LESS

Why Settling Is Always About Accepting Less Than You Deserve

Stay in tune to what you want big or small. Talk with family or friends who have the same goals or values that you have. Say it out loud, put it out to the universe and you will get it back from the people that will support you.

When You Think You Are Worthy Of The Best, Then You Want Settle For Less Than You Deserve

Recognize that being alone is perfectly fine. When you settle for less you will get lousy friendships, lovers or business partners just to find your are truly alone. Accept being alone now, so you can get something better later.

If It Doesn’t Make Your Better Than You Don’t Need It

Affirm your self-worth, You Are Good Enough, You Are Strong Enough, You Are Worthy. Be mindful of what you think, feel and want. Live your life in ways that truly reflect this.

When It’s Right It Will Be In Harmony With Your Mind, Body & Soul

Find your happy place. Where is the one place that makes you feel calm, happy and positive. Grab a cup of your favorite tea, coffee, wine, whatever your choice of drink maybe, and sit down for a few minutes on your own. No TV or distractions, just you.

Self-love is ever evolving. It’s something that needs to be practiced daily, so be kind and supportive to yourself through good times and hard times.

Setting Realistic Self-Care Goals

When we start the new year many of us start with New Year’s resolutions. However, by the end of the month how realistic were the goals that we set for ourselves at the beginning of the year. Let’s think about our goals as our GPS. When we use our GPS we enter our starting location where we are, then we enter our destination where we are going. How do we set realistic obtainable goals so that we can get to our end destination? When we don’t set realistic goals we will go off course but have no fear just like your GPS you will be rerouted until you get back on course. It is good to set goals that you can accomplish as opposed to the ones you wish you could accomplish. The biggest achievement is the goals that you can achieve. So, let’s talk about how we can set some goals with self- care that will help determine your success.

One of my goals was to pursue my master’s degree in social work and eventually becoming a clinical licensed social worker. I started off knowing that I would have to juggle many aspects of my life. I set some goals on what I wanted to accomplish daily, weekly, and monthly with completing school assignments, preparing for my internship, working full time, and being available for my family. After many nights of falling asleep with the computer on the bed, books on the floor, losing the concept of days and time, not eating, and barely waking up enough time for work. I soon realize my goals where not realistic in what I was trying to accomplish in a day. Not only was I unable to fulfill some of my school and work obligations, but I also did not leave time for myself. Setting a goal of working a school assignments two to three days before the due date, planning for an internship in the summertime, and leaving time for myself and my family at the end of the day were goals that I begin to set after realizing my goals I originally set where not realistic. Only after the mental health of my mind became overloaded by too many tasks. After all, we still have to take care of our mental health which is a big part of self-care.

Bubble baths, journaling are all great attributes of self-care but getting into a good work out routine for myself was a great way for me to care for myself. According to the National Institute of Health, “aerobic exercises, including jogging, swimming, cycling, walking, gardening, and dancing, have been proved to reduce anxiety and depression”. “These improvements in mood are proposed to be caused by exercise-induced increase in blood circulation to the brain and by an influence on the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis and, thus, on the physiologic reactivity to stress”.

The other benefits of setting realistic goals with self care are:

Improved sleep

Increased interest in sex

Better endurance

Stress relief

Improvement in mood

Increased energy and stamina

Reduced tiredness that can increase mental alertness

Weight reduction

Reduced cholesterol and improved cardiovascular fitness

Setting goals that are realistic is about finding out what you want to achieve, and then commit to it.

Fall in love with taking care of your yourself. Mind, Body & Spirit.

Money Management through Self-Care

As many Americans continue to struggle through out this pandemic their now has been some relief for many families. According to the American Psychological Association, finances are the number one stressor for Americans. Financial trauma is a real thing and can take a toll on your mental health. This can cause depression, stress and anxieties and unhealthy spending habits. Are you practicing self care through shopping sprees, dining out or other luxury items? What does money management and financial wellness mean to you? How can we achieve all of these in addition to maintaining our self care. Let’s take some time to examine our behavior. Having a plan to take better care of ourselves and make progress to become better money mangers to create financial wealth.

The stimulus plan has landed, on March 11, 2021, President Biden passed the 1.9 trillion economic American Rescue Plan. Providing millions of families that qualify with $1400.00 his includes single tax filers making up to $75,000 per year, married couples filing jointly making up to $160,000, or head of households making up to $112,500. Dependents also qualified for stimulus money. This was only just some of the highlights of the bill, but have you decided what you are going to do with your stimulus money? Many families who have lost income during the pandemic will need to use their checks to put food on the table or keep a roof over their heads. However, if you are fortunate to be still fully employed and not financially distressed, consider putting your stimulus check to work and manage your money.

Just like exercise helps with endurance, don’t think short term when it comes to money management. You will need endurance goal setting, focus, commitment, perseverance, and good old-fashioned hard work. It takes a lot of commitment to reach your goals of managing your money with self-care. Taking care of your financial needs can help reduce stress and improve your quality of life. I am guilty of spending money on unnecessary items and eating out more when I can cook at home, or overcompensating my self-care needs. Soon thereafter I begin to realize when I have to pay bills at the end of the month I have overspent or didn’t need that purchase. To change these habits I begin to change my mindset on how I looked at my finances. I looked at my future and my current financial choices and visualizing what I wanted my future to look like. I started small by incorporating these routines into my self-care routine. Take a look, and see how you can make a plan and let’s see how it goes!

Making A Plan

WEEKLY FINANCIAL CHECK INS

Find your favorite playlist and drink a cup of tea or coffee and do a weekly check in. I found tracking what I spend is helpful. Every Sunday I have an excel spreadsheet that I use for tracking my spending. However, there are many free apps that will sync directly to your bank accounts that will track the spending for you. If I have money left over I allocate my money to different accounts (savings, retirements, stocks).

LOOK FOR WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR CASH FLOW

You can never have enough and you can always look for ways to improve your cash flow. One of my side hustles is selling surplus of clothing that I no longer need on Poshmark and Mercari. If you are doing some spring cleaning and haven’t worn a item within the past 6 months, and it’s still in excellent condition why not sell it. This is a great way to bring in some extra cash. Also, what a great way to chip away at other financial debt that you may have.

SPEND IN ALIGMENT WITH YOUR PERSONALITY AND VALUES

Making a plan with money management comes with being in it for the long haul. So, let be realistic you still have to reward your self at times to stop the urge from over spending. One way you can do this is make sure you budget for things that bring you joy.

Incorporating money management into an overall self-care routine can help restore a sense of order. It’s not about living a life full of restrictions, but about taking care of yourself and including your finances as apart of your self-care.

Let us know how you are doing with money management through self care, leave a comment below I would love to hear from you!

Stop And Smell The Flowers

Be Yourself, But Be Your Best Self. Becoming your best self often comes with a change mindset. Allow yourself your positive thinking and create a new sense of confidence. It want to happen overnight, but it’s a journey of self-discovery. Start by trying something new, leave your comfort zone, and sustain your motivation. Focus on self-care & your mental health – ooh don’t forget to stop and smell the flowers.

I must say that I love flowers, and I’m lucky enough to have someone to buy them for me and I buy them for myself. Having fresh flowers in your home can help you feel better mentally and physically. The American Society for Horticulture Science conducted a test of whether plants have therapeutic influences. The study concluded that fresh flowers can help reduce feelings of anxiety and can ease some physical pain. If you are feeling a little blue, stressed or under the weather, a bouquet of flowers may be the best self-care medicine that you need. Just seeing beautiful flowers always seems to brighten my mood.

If you have a green thumb, grab a shovel and start digging in your backyard to create a beautiful flower bed. According to other studies digging into the earth and creating beautiful flower beds around your home has many benefits like going to the gym. If you’re not up to going to the gym plant some seeds instead. Self-care is clearly defined by what makes you happy and discovering small things and activities that would bring you joy.

Meditation Self-Awareness

Instead of rushing unconsciously into your day, set aside a few minutes to sit quiet with yourself. Make sure your calm, centered and relaxed. Now get centered with your intentions for the day, that way you are prepared for a harmonious positive experience.

As I begin to meditate over a period of time I naturally developed a sense of self-awareness. Webster dictionary defines meditation as “reflect, ponder, to engage in contemplation” which is meditation is more spiritual or religious life. Many people look to mediation to get in touch with their spiritual side. However, I was looking to meditation for the benefit of quiet time, visualizing my day, organizing my thoughts and to help reduce stress. There is no exact way to meditate it is what is suitable for each individual.

We our nothing to ourselves if we can not pour into ourselves first. I believe that the more we know about ourselves, the closer we can get to becoming the best version of ourselves. To slow down the pace of my life I begin to find ways to develop my own self-awareness. Here are some suggestions I used for slowing up the pace in my life:

Keep a journal is the best way to start to learn yourself. It gives you a place to think, write and organize your thoughts to help in your development of self-awareness.

Take time in the morning or at the end of the day to meditate

Leave time in your day to eat, slowly walk and get to the responsibilities that you have in a non-hurried way.

When we become self aware we begin to have the ability to make smarter choices that positively impact our lives and the worlds. People that know themselves seem to be much happier. According to the National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine, meditation can help you boost your immune system, reduce stress, and cope with illness and improve psychological balance.

Namaste!

Over to You

I would love to hear from you. Tell me how you’re working on developing your self-awareness in the comment section below.